Do you believe in love at first sight?
Is this something that you believe in? That when you meet them there will be an instant recognition and a knowing, you will see them standing there and you will know and so will they that you are the one. Do I believe in this well no, but it happened to me so I should or did it?
I had gone the Match.com route and was heading toward the restaurant to meet some one with a really terrible picture. In fact that was half the reason I picked him. I had been romanced by men with professional photos and I didn’t like the professionalism of it at all. This picture was so awful I knew he was not a player. So there I was heading to meet this man who mostly had a picture of the ceiling. I said that the photo was half the reason. The other was an intelligent grammatically correct letter – sold!
It was cold and there were several people waiting and everyone was bundled up head to toe. There was one man who caught my attention. His eyes were clear direct and honest. The thought that crossed my mind is he is a clear glass of water, transparent, direct honest. I knew in a heart beat I did not want to let him get away. So I squared my shoulders and said “I know this is really forward but I am about to meet a blind date. I don’t want to be rude or hurt his feelings so I don’t have much time. I don’t want you to walk away without getting your number. The smile got bigger and then I imagined a big ceiling hovering over his head this was my date.
But that moment when I decided all those characteristics about him what was that? Chemistry? Cupid launching? I think I had a perspective. I made a rapid fire decision that this is who this man is. You might call it a hunch. I call it luck that I wasn’t wrong. There is an old saying you can’t judge a book by its cover yet we continually do.
Not only that but we have made it mythic by declaring our perspective “love at first sight” What you are doing is gambling with your happiness by thinking that chemistry is the answer. It’s a fast reaction. It’s lovely you are interested but you are not going to know that person until you put in the time and effort to know them.
Instead we make automatic decisions about who they are and then react with disappointment when they are not that person we imagined. Don’t walk away if you heart didn’t go zing . You don’t know them yet. If you are really interested in being with someone then be with someone and learn who they are. If they are not the one then it is time to look again.
And yes we are still together and I was right about him but that was a lucky guess.
If you are feeling unsure about the mechanics of love call me for a free consultation at (917) 456-4127